![]() You first need to get those emotions and motivations in check. If you are harboring thoughts of payback, wanting to take someone down a notch, feeling superior, or looking for a scapegoat, then the time and situation is not right for you to be candid. To prepare yourself for a candid conversation, you should take time and think through what you will say and how you will say it. Think about it this way – would you rather hear a hard truth that hurt for a moment but gave you the insight you needed to improve OR would you rather continue to operate in a way that diminished your contribution, credibility and standing? Really helping someone else may mean telling them the truth, candidly. Your kindness may be the very thing that stands in the way of someone else’s success. Not knowing means not having a chance to correct course. It is far more likely, though, that you are gambling with someone else’s reputation and professional standing. By withholding information or diluting feedback you give to others, you may feel that you are being kind. You feel you are protecting someone from the truth.The way you say it must reflect that certainty if you expect others to understand your meaning. ![]() Being “free from reservation” means you are certain about what you are saying. In fact, you can do more harm than good if you are tentative instead of being candid. There is no need to soften or qualify the truth if your intention is to remedy a situation or to help others. You beat around the bush, minimize your own statements or apologize for what you say.Stick to specifics and actual examples if you wish to be seen as sincere. ![]() They are instant flags to others that you are embellishing the truth because very few things are always or never. Note that “straightforward” includes the direction “forward.” Looking back and saying things that are not productive in moving the team forward will be counterproductive – you will not enjoy the benefits described above by using candor as an excuse for lashing out at others. Being “free from reservation” does not give you license to attack, to point fingers, or to make others feel bad. Being candid is not about being self-serving. Being “free from disguise or subterfuge” means you have to look beyond your own emotions and agenda. In order to be open and sincere, you first have to evaluate and consider multiple perspectives.
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